21 posts tagged “buddha”

Well, it had to end sometime. In last night's final episode of "I Love New York 2," the show's titular queen made her pick from her remaining would-be suitors.

While she couldn't deny that "Buddha is hot, sexy, and big" (eccch!), in the end she picked his rival, the weasel-y "Tailor-Made."

I have a feeling, though, that this isn't the last we'll see of "Buddha." After all, I Love New York 2 was a spin-off of I Love New York (duh) and that show was a spin-off of Flavor of Love.

Oh, please, please, please, VH1 -- give us a "Buddha Love" spin-off!

(And if there was such a show, dear readers -- what would you call it?)

Well, tonight's penultimate episode of I Love New York 2 was filled, typically, with intrigue, backbiting, and ludicrous boob-shots. There were  also, of course, many great quotes about "Buddha." No, "New York" (left) wasn't talking about The Awakened One. She was talking about her would-be suitor, one of three left -- actually, two, as of the end of tonight's show.

We've been sharing all the Buddha-talk with you, so that you can enjoy all their cognitively dissonant glory. Here are just some of tonight's quotes. (Couldn't get them all -- they came faster than they could be written down!)

* "Buddha's being really flirty with me."

* "Buddha, will you escort me back to my hotel?"

* [New York's mom:] "I'm so upset that Buddha's one step closer to winning New York's heart." And, later: "Buddha? Believe this: he will never be my son-in-law."

* [Fellow would-be suitor "Punk," complaining about Buddha's duplicity:] "I just really need to make New York see the light about Buddha, 'cause it's really getting out of hand right now."

* [New York, having realized the truth about Buddha's duplicity:] "Buddha is a fool and an asshole -- he's lying."

* Fellow would-be suitor "Tailor-Made" agreed: "Buddha is arrogant, dangerous, fake, and manipulative."

But in the end, New York couldn't bring herself to give Buddha the boot. As she told him, "Buddha, you're sexy as hell -- you dominate me, and you keep me in check."

So poor "Punk" was sent packing, and New York, Tailor-Made, and Buddha headed off to Jamaica for some final-episode insanity. (It airs this Wednesday night.)

I'd wager that when they touched down, the locals all wondered one thing: What are these maniacs smoking?

Horse friend and fave Konchog Norbu sent us a link to Lucky Beer, which features a big ole Buddha -- or rather, Hotei, the "fat Buddha" -- right on the bottle.

As he writes:

Oh, Hoss...don't ask how I came across this. I just did. Don't worry -- I'm headed to Australia in January. I'll straighten those blokes out.

The question, as he puts it, is: "Lucky for whom?"

See more here.

A post that we made a few days ago told you about the existence -- and also the curse- and typo-laden marketing -- of a strain of "legal weed" called "Big Buddha Bud."

Since then we've done a little research on it. (No, not that kind of research.)

We went to the site that's selling it. Up on the top of each page, customers' testimonials appear, sharing about their wonderful experiences with BBB. We include a couple of the most particularly Burger-licious ones here.

(See our original BBB posting, here.)

Sometimes, you catch a break.

Tonight, in the last two minutes of VH1's "reality" show, "I Love New York 2," the show's titular queen announced that she was eliminating two of her suitors, and bringing one back.

She called for the returning housemate with all her usual eloquence, by simply calling, "Yo, Buddha!"

And in walked "Buddha." (Real name: Ezra.)

So what? Who cares, right? Well, sure. There's no good reason to care. But there's a fun reason to care, and that reason is for all the truly weird one-liners that happen when you have someone named "Buddha" on a show like "I Love New York."

The show's resident snitch, known as "Tailor-Made," delivered a couple such quotations in the show's closing moments. Such as:

"Basically, Buddha did everything he could to defame my character."

...and, said while actually wearing a t-shirt with a gold Buddha (the real kind) on it:

"The thought of Buddha being on a date with New York just makes me sick."

Ah, cognitive dissonance. It's a wonderful thing.

So welcome back, Buddha!


(You'll find a couple of other good ILNY/Buddha quotes here and here.)

The Horse has talked a few times about how often pot-culture makes reference to "Buddha" as a name for pot itself. Recently a MySpace "friend" posted this ad on the Horse's MySpace page.

It's an ad for "Big Buddha Bud." The copy recounts a very true-to-life conversation between dear friends. Ahem:

My buddy Mark stopped hanging out with me because he has to do a piss test every week. Just last week, though, I see him sparking up. I'm like "Dude are you smoking bud again???" and he is all "Yeah! I bought ONE POUND of legal bud at [website] and I don't need to worry, this shit doesn't come up in piss tests and it's some potent shit!"

Then, our unnamed narrator replies to his good friend Mark, "One pound??? Holy fuck dude you can sell this shit!!!" After seeing how good this bud was I decided to go to [website] myself and bought 8 ounces of Big Buddha Bud. I figured I might as well smoke this and be a local retailer in the neighborhood too."

Um, what's that advice that the Buddha gave about picking your friends? Oh yeah: choose ones who will be good Dharma-friends, who will help you uphold what you're trying to do in your practice. He even said that a poor choice of friend might be "a ready companion to frequent the streets at ungodly hours." And that's not even talking about the use of intoxicants!

Not that so many of us are perfect, but old Mark and our unnamed narrator ain't even tryin'.

As for the MySpace friend who posted this, thanks. Unfortunately, I don't think it was sent as a Dharma-Burger submission. It was actually one of several junk postings that she had posted in a row.

So I hope she doesn't mind that she's since been ...ahem... DE-friended.

Thanks to reader Ben Hutchison who sent on this pic. He writes:

I found this Buddha statue in the discount section of Target for $2.50 and thought it'd be appropriate.

Yeah it is, Ben.

Yeah. It is.

...Ben also sent another little note, not Target-related, but in a similar spirit:

I thought I'd pass along this little tidbit about my last job.  I worked for a company called Karma, Inc.  I wasn't even aware that the company was called Karma when I applied, but it turns out that my boss was screwed over by his partner at his last company which resulted in him losing everything. So in a split-second decision he decided to name his company Karma because of the "bad karma" he'd received thus far. He wasn't really interested in any form of buddhism or hinduism or anything like that.

I think he may have regrets about naming the company that now because no one understands the significance. 

It was oddly auspicious for me, though!

Thanks for the tidbit, Ben. Stay in touch as the wheel rolls on.

Yes, it's true: On "I Love New York 2," Ezra -- nicknamed Buddha -- was summarily dismissed for headbutting another suitor of the show's titular queen.

Said New York in explaining her decision to kick Ezra to the curb:

"Buddha had to leave, because he got violent and very physical."

He will be missed.

(OK. He won't actually be missed. But the show's weird, quotable comments about "Buddha" sure will be.)